Mind & Heart♡

Sigmund Freud considered personality to be like an iceberg; personality exists below our level of awareness, just as the massive part of an iceberg is beneath the surface of the water. when ego starts to get signal that id will harm an individual through the means of anxiety, ego resolve the conflict through repression.

Repression is a defense mechanism where emotions are hidden beneath the unconscious state. Much as like pretending until the unwanted emotions are already been “unnoticed but never gone.”

My professor once said that pains of separation are never classified as finished business when there is no closure at all.

On my opinion based from my understanding, pains of separation are hidden below water —on the unconscious state. Which might soon reveal when triggered. When a situation like breaking up, does not have good closure, people will keep on coming back to that same spot having the same pain but “MAYBE” in a different intensity. For it was hidden somewhere within/beneath and will never be gone until solved. ACCEPTANCE and GOOD CLOSURE are top most solution. In this way, there is no point of REPRESSING feelings or emotions, no point of PRETENDING. COURAGEOUSLY walking in the battlefield until war is finished. no signs of FORGERY but a form of ALCHEMY OF ONESELF -maturity. :)

why do we call player a player? is it because he’s playing with someone’s emotion? is it because he’s playing someone’s thoughts? or maybe, just a little maybe, because HE CAN PLAY IT RIGHT AND SAFE. playing with love doesn’t serve any negativeness. it’s just a great way of escaping from excruciating pain. a caution, perhaps. play it right. play it simple. but so they say, PLAYERS are rude because they’re playing with others’ emotions. WRONG. emotions are deceiving at times and it might kill, so emotions should not be considered too much in this world. and sometimes, people who they labeled as players are not aware that they are capable of —hurting others by their actions. technically, what’s wrong with PLAYING SAFE? isn’t it safe a good thing? saving yourself from an even bigger complication. yes, it might sound selfish, self-centered, whatever the heck they want to call it. but being selfish is not that evil as it seems. being selfish is taking away fragility. and by the way, people by nature are self-centered. going back. players are players because they know how to clutch feelings and eradicate deceiving emotions away. players are players because they know how to play with love just enough to avoid all the damages that has been done before. playing, is applying what you have learned from you mistakes. PLAYING IS DECEIVING YOUR ENEMY TO WIN THE BATTLE. THE FIRST ONE TO BE DECEIVED LOSES.

why do we call cheater a cheater? they also know how to play it right because they have to avoid getting caught. basically, a cheater is a cheater because he cheats. as simple as that. no matter what reason beyond, it’s still CHEATING.

let me share two brief conclusion of mine:

1. PLAYING is being smart while CHEATING is being witty. both are being selfish BUT in a different degree.

2. all cheaters are players, but not all players are cheaters.

you decide, you defend. which is bad? which is not? which side do you belong or  willing to take?

have you ever been seated at the front seat of a car and got hit by a truck, ALMOST?

have you accidentally rode the same cab twice?

have you ever traveled from manila all the way to marikina just to drop a girl then went back?

have you ever been at the backseat of the cab, but suddenly realized that you want to take the front seat (where u’re friend is sitting), then both of you ended up switching places at the middle of the road while traffic light is on its RED mode & your cellphone perfectly fell on the road breaking into pieces?

have you entered your unit, smelt a flower then got frightened because you thought it was your grandmother’s scent from grave when all along it was just a flower given by someone?

i spent sleepless nights

and oftentimes wake up with stains of tears on my pillow

but deep in my heart i know

that it’s the best way to truly find myself

before, i was scared to be alone

but now i know that being alone,

doesn’t make me a less of a person.

and so i let myself free for a moment.

i lived with myself.

discover a little bit more.

left the world of dependence.

and now i return.

it’s my choice to know better

and by chance i’ve learned a lot.

loving after a painful breakup; it’s a passion

passion to let yourself be vulnerable to others again

and passion to trust yourself that you can still give

what you had given before beyond a great devastation from the past.

now tis my turn

tis my time to be happy

tis time to pursue my will

as long as i want to be what i should

now i am capable of rerouting what i’ve experienced before

i let myself free for a moment.

i lived with myself.

discover a little bit more.

left the world of dependence.

and now i return.

it’s my choice to know better

and by chance i’ve learned a lot.

loving after a painful breakup; it’s a passion

passion to let yourself be vulnerable to others again

and passion to trust yourself that you can still give

what you had given before

beyond a great devastation from the past

it’s my choice to know him better
and by chance i fell in love.
it’s by chance he knew her better
and by choice he make her fall in love with him.
i let myself free for a moment,
he make himself imprisoned.
mine, plain passion.
his, plain forgery.
what’s yours?